Happy Mother’s Day (barf) 

If you know me AT ALL, you know that I have a tremendous distaste for all holidays that, in my opinion, were just created by the card industry to pump up sales.  Mother’s Day, Valentine’s Day…  Zombie New Year.  I think it is all total crap.

But that could be because I think every day is what you make of it.  And I am lucky (and delusional) enough to have most days revolve around me anyway!  Seriously though, becoming a mom led me to weigh 200 pounds, totally screwed with my already imbalanced state of mind and made my hair fall out.  (I have a feeling more of said hair will start falling out when she turns 13.)  However, I now have a little lady who is my best buddy and total partner in crime.


(Yes, that is me.  No, we will not speak any more of it.)

So I don’t really feel the need to have a special Mother’s Day, as every day (even the really shitty ones) have hidden joys that make it wonderful to be a mom.  Take this Tuesday…

I am trying desperately to lose this last ten Ohio depression pounds that just won’t go away.  Some days it goes well, some days it doesn’t.  On Tuesday, I (being the closet junk eater that I am) found myself huddled in the kitchen, Lucky Charms FAMILY SIZED box open and picking through/eating every single marshmallow from the box.  (I found cereal marshmallows in bulk HERE.  I will buy them once I have given up on life completely.)

Around the corner comes Pickle, who catches me as I shove hearts, shooting stars, horseshoes, clovers, moons, balloons, pots of gold and rainbows into my face.  (Yes, it was magically delicious.)  At first she looks totally appalled and a tremendous sense of guilt runs over me as I realize that I am basically destroying her breakfast cereal.  She then walks over to me, gives me a hug and says “You are the best mommy ever!”  Needless to say, I am confused as fuck.  “Why?” I ask.  “I don’t really like the ‘luckies’ in my cereal.  Now I don’t have to pick them out!”

I don’t need a brunch and a card to feel special.  My little girl does it for me every single day.  (But for all of you suckers who do enjoy this holiday, I hope it is a beautiful one!  And I hope it is filled with all the luckies your heart desires.)


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3 Responses to Happy Mother’s Day (barf)

  1. Ann D. says:

    The best cereal story I ever heard!
    By the way, Mother’s Day originated with a Methodist woman who wanted to honor her mother and gave out flowers to women at her church on her mother’s birthday. After Mother’s Day became a big commercial holiday, she regretted the whole thing and campaigned against it for the rest of her life.

  2. Ann D. says:

    P.S. Happy Everyday to a great mom and blogger!

  3. Pingback: Writing Your Job Description: SAHM Edition | Frenemom

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